A(NU) Thought

Raj ( naam toh suna hi hoga ) aspires to be among the high performers in the team, but despite all his efforts, he believes he is average. He thinks, “I want to be creative, but I’m afraid of being judged.”   and  “I want to sound confident, but I constantly second-guess myself.” Sounds familiar? At home, he wants to spend more time with his wife and son, but his work keeps him away from dinner table, in his room converted into home office.   Socially, he often wants to say no to friends, but being a good-hearted person, he ends up helping them more than he can. People know him as someone who can be counted upon. Outcome : work-life imbalance, stress, anxiety, unhappiness, fatigue, self-doubt, defensiveness and more.

The previous post highlighted Classical Conditioning at Workplace . A recap: Classical Conditioning is when our brain automatically starts associating a previously neutral trigger with an experience that repeatedly evokes a particular emotional or physical response. Over time, the trigger itself begins producing that same response. Our personal and social lives are not untouched by such conditioning, and funnily we don’t even realize how subtly it becomes a part of our routine. Certain words, people, or places make you feel something or trigger any emotion - happiness, excitement, fear, anxiety, anger, or sadness - before anything has actually happened? Think about these: Your spouse calling you by your full name A message from your partner saying, "We need to talk" The words "Exam Season" Your in-laws announcing they're visiting A call from your best friend. Or, how can I not mention... a call from Bajaj Finance (or any o...

Why Does Your Heart Race Before the Meeting Even Begins? Have you ever noticed how your body reacts before your mind does? Your manager's name flashes on your phone. A Teams meeting notification pops up. An Outlook email lands in your inbox. Or Monday morning meeting that starts bothering you from Sunday onwards. Before you've even read the message or joined the call, you've already felt something. !!Stress. Anxiety. Pressure.!! Why does this happen? Psychologists call this Classical Conditioning . Classical Conditioning is a type of learning where our brain automatically associates a previously neutral trigger with an experience that repeatedly evokes a particular emotional or physical response. (Read that again!) Over time, the trigger itself begins producing that same response.

Yellowface by Rebecca F. Kuang is a satirical novel, about June Hayward (Juniper Song) who steals her frenemy Athena Liu’s manuscript after her death and releases it as her own. She edits the script, sends it to publishers as her own and goes on to become a bestseller. As she tries to protect her secret, she goes farther than she ever thought she would. I found the story engaging enough, but the conclusion didn't quite work for me. We are used to dramatic ending but here it was pretty much how life is – regular, plain vanilla. Never mind! Kuang is an award-winning author. This was my first book by Kuang and it was so well marketed, I had to pick up and read what it was about. I realized the book itself mirrored the very things I mentioned in the previous sentence, as it was about publishing industry, marketing, how readers were buying more books because of certain controversy.

Yes, whether good or bad, people remember the emotions they experienced in their interactions with you. And this applies as much to workplaces as it does to personal and social relationships. Try this for a moment . Sit quietly for 30 seconds. Relaxed. Close your eyes (if possible), and think about your boss/ manager from your first job. What memory comes to your mind first? Is it any particular scene? How did it make you feel then? How does it make you feel right now?

Everyone is the protagonist in their own story One thing I have realized over time is this: Every person is the protagonist in his or her own life. No matter who they are. The partner who controls every decision and calls it care. The friend who disappears when needed most, yet believes they are loyal. The boss who constantly demoralizes employees. The parent who is so strict that fear replaces comfort. The teacher who pressures students into taking private tuition. The colleague who takes credit for teamwork and calls it visibility. The influencer who spreads misinformation and calls it freedom of expression. Whether knowingly or unknowingly, ethically or unethically, most people believe they are justified in what they do.